only child syndrome

As a middle child, I have never had the luxury of being the one with all the attention or the baby of the family. I would not go as far to say that I have “middle child syndrome” but I have this insane need to be around people all the time. Last year around this time I was in a constant panic because my younger sister was leaving for college and my older sister had moved so that left me. Alone. With Sue and Bill. I felt like I was being left behind and the thought of being an “only child” scared the living crap out of me. Until I realized how awesome it was.



I thought that mom and dad would focus all their attention on me which would obviously become a huge pain in the ass but really it was the opposite. My dad refs high school and college basketball from September through March and so he was rarely home when I was. And so that left me and my mom. We got into each other’s habits i.e. I started drinking wine when I got home with her and she started reading US Weekly and Life & Style while she drank her wine. All was well. And then May came around again, Brittany was back from school and my dad resorted back to his summer activity of golf. I quickly realized how silly it was for me to think that being an only child would be anything but great.


Now, of course I love my sister and I do miss her while she is away but to say that Britt “stirred the pot” while she was home is like saying that the sky is only sort of blue or vuvuzelas are only a little annoying. Everything she did over the summer I had done once in my life. Of course I would have parties while my parents were away or leave the house at absurd times during the night or drink myself stupid or not call for hours on end so that everyone thinks you are dead or sleep “somewhere” when you’re really sleeping “somewhere” else. The difference between us is that I only got caught in a handful of these poor choices. It seemed that this summer every time she did something stupid she got caught. Whatever happened to learning from your older siblings’ mistakes? For example, I learned from my older sister not to leave condoms strewn about and not to smoke on the corner of our own street because someone will see you. I also learned that really the only thing our parents ask from us is that we call and let them know where we are. Even if we aren’t really where we say we are, they just like to know we’re alive.


My point is that come this past Saturday I think everyone was ready to wrap up the summer. Britt was thrilled to be going back to school and of course I was insanely jealous that she got to go back and I couldn’t. Now we’re back to our quiet, 3 person house. Once basketball starts, it will be back to me, Sue, wine and US Weekly and I am for sure looking forward to that. Like almost all summers I am always sad when it comes to an end and this year is no different. But for some reason this year there is a part of me that is ready for fall. I think the intense heat this year and all the excessive drinking that was done has me tired out. Or maybe it’s just me getting old? I hope not but fall in New York is my favorite. Before you know it, it will be Christmas and Britt will be back home being escorted to our front door by the police. That didn’t happen this summer but it seems on trend. I guess when half of your college tuition has been taken care of because you’re a semi-genius you can afford to make these little mistakes. What would college be without them anyway? Boring as hell, that’s what.